She Thought Soy Milk was I am Milk

oh holy shit fuckerdy, I am tired. Not like tired tired - but just trying to come to terms with things emotionally. This whole pilot process is way more emotionally tolling than one could imagine. For real, seems like this magical dream, but that’s just the romanticized version. Again, don’t get me wrong, worst problem in the world to have - wow my head hurts because I’ve been researching trademarking for the pilot they are basing on my life and my brand. *worlds smallest violin*

This is all a very strange thing to experience, and then broadcast. One, I have to be conscious to not tell the whole story - while at the same time, it totally excites me that I’ve documented every.single.step of the journey from the very beginning in the hopes that people could learn something from it. Actually, lemme keep it real, I posted those thoughts in the beginning just as a sounding board for myself. At the time, no one read us - so I lie, I didn’t do it for you, I did it for me; life is reflective. The documenting in real time however has been the most bitchin part about the entire last year. Every meeting, every skype, every anything - all documented.

Dude, I just want my own home again. Like so badly. Like so so so so so badly. I want to go to the grocery store, buy my own groceries, and sleep in a bed that I call my own. Day 98 of sleeping on my current couch situation, and haven’t had a home to call my own since May 23, 2010. Fucking bat shit. Fucking bat shit. Fucking bat shit. I had no idea it would have lasted as long as it did. Again, I still would ABSOLUTELY do it all over again - duh. But, I just need to decompress. Nothing has really even started yet, and that just blows my mind. Dude, so many people know the story too. BLOWS MY MIND that a friend of the site had a friend working over at the Verizon call center when I called in a few weeks back - they heard my name and went CRAZYYY!!! The guy was like, you talked to @JenFriel?!? OMG OMG OMG OMG!! It’s weird, and none of that has hit me. You see analytics, but they’re just numbers on a page. I kinda get it every once in a while when I go out - but then I come home and sleep on a couch. Keeps you humble, thats for sure, but I still won’t change.

HAHA, famous last words, I know I know. But I’ve already been around this part of the rodeo. I’ve lived in LA for 7 years, I’m very honestly not phased by much. I just really really REALLY love my website. I LOVE exploring human nature, in an honest and engaging way. I just want to tell stories in social media, and some how come up with this formula to then be able to shift into more of a producer mode for other people’s stories when my own becomes too public and uninteresting.

I REALLY REALLY REALLY WANT A HOME!! PLEASE!! AN APARTMENT! A ROOM! A PLACE TO ACTUALLY PUT THE FEW THINGS IN THIS WORLD I STILL HAAVVVEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

I just want to keep coming up with ways of getting sponsors to cross shit off my bucketlist. Skydiving was AHMAZING! And oh yeah, sponsored by a bedding company?!? Insane. People just really like the brand name, I almost never hear the word “no.” Which is rad, because I never settle for a no anyway; it’s just a starting off point.

I REALLY WANT A HOMEEEE!!! I REALLY REALLY REALLLLYYYYYY WANT A HOMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ps. my parents are proud of me again. that feels good.

p.p.s my brother told me i had put on weight since he last saw me. i informed him that it was difficult to find a low carb option when you are bartering for food all day, every day for a year. BUT! That’s why my latest sponsorship is a gym. Oh LA - behave.

#kthxbye

1 year ago  /  1 note